[Mkguild] MKGuild Digest, Vol 179, Issue 14

[Indagare]

This was a really great story Rimme! Like I said before, I think the ending
was pretty neat and also a bit surprising!

-Indy

On Mon, Jan 23, 2023 at 4:01 PM <mkguild-request at lists.integral.org> wrote:

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>    1. Blossom (6/6) (Rimme the Weasel)
>
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> Message: 1
> Date: Mon, 23 Jan 2023 15:00:00 -0600
> From: Rimme the Weasel <ontherimme at gmail.com>
> To: Metamor Keep <mkguild at lists.integral.org>
> Subject: [Mkguild] Blossom (6/6)
> Message-ID:
>         <CAJ-QGkX0UMXm=
> M-h9ut-2X8f0zkpQG4WAeqUu3D+Jhp3sCb3pw at mail.gmail.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8"
>
> Part 6 of Blossom.
>
> ----
>
>
> March 16, 717 CR
>
>
> Volden did not mourn as long as he wished he could have. His heart still
> felt like lead, but the sheep had been confined to Twone for long enough.
> Inside, he could feel their yearning to see the Midlands once again. Life
> must go on; the sheep must go to pasture.
>
> That morning, before the sun was up, Volden stirred and rose from his bed,
> his wife Jera still asleep. She was always a deep sleeper, to her unending
> shame. Volden had already kissed her farewell last night, and so did not
> wake her. He crept out to the rainbarrel outside and splashed some water on
> his face. Wiping the sleep from his eyes, and straightening his hair, he
> turned back inside. A long journey was ahead of him, and he needed to start
> it out right.
>
> His clothes, freshly mended and brushed clean, sat ready for him. His pack
> stocked with rations and tools, his belt with his knife and flute and
> waterskin and coin purse, and his crock all sat to one side, where he had
> inspected and resorted them all over the last two days. One by one, he
> donned each of his clothes, focusing as best he could on the names and
> habits of his sheep.
>
> The days had been slow at first. That evening after returning to Twone, he
> told Jera what he had seen, and showed him their daughter's shoe. Jera, his
> rock and his root in this world, simply held him, her tears silently
> wetting his shoulder. They decided not to show their three younger children
> unless they asked. Thankfully, they never did.
>
> Jera put on a brave face, and kept the farm running as it should. She
> didn't pressure Volden to take his sheep out. There was still weeding and
> plowing and seeding to be done. They were menial enough tasks for Volden to
> keep himself busy, without thinking about the sheep. The guilt crept up on
> him, day by day, until Volden had to admit that he was letting the child
> within him take over, and that he had to put his own words to practice.
> There was business to get to.
>
> After adjusting his smock one last time, settling the pack on his
> shoulders, and taking his trusty crock in hand, he stepped out into the
> early morning. The full moon had already set behind the mountains, and the
> skies were purple with twilight glow. From the distant town, a few people
> were already starting their daily chores, their voices a distant murmur in
> the light breeze. Volden walked the edge of town southward to the barn.
>
> Bola, their oldest child, was already at the gate, slingshot in hand. He
> smiled and waved innocently as Volden came near. "Up early, aren't you?"
> Volden said.
>
> Bola looked aback. "I wanted to see you off," he said.
>
> Volden smiled, and tousled Bola's hair, to which he squirmed. "Thanks,"
> Volden said.
>
> Bola pulled back and straightened his hair. "How old until I can come with
> you into the field?"
>
> "Not for a few more years. There's still so much work for you and Ma to do
> on the farm." Volden paused, and answered the question Bola was about to
> ask. "Not even Lori ever went out of the valley with me."
>
> Bola was only eight years old; there was too much he had to learn before he
> could go out into the world. The flock wasn't big enough to need two
> shepherds watching them. And besides, Volden wasn't ready to lose another
> child.
>
> "I've been practicing my shot," Bola said proudly. "See that stick over
> there?" He pointed to a stick lying on a patch of dirt thirty feet away. "I
> can get it knocked over in only three tries!"
>
> "Well, when you can knock down two sticks, side by side, each in only one
> try, then you can come with me to the pasture." Volden had a twinge of
> regret in making that promise, as he had no intention of keeping. But
> perhaps it would give Bola something to do. And perhaps it would give Bola
> a way to defend himself -- something Lori had never gotten.
>
> Bola grinned and nodded. Volden turned his attention to the barn. He opened
> the barn gate, and one by one undid the latches of the pens. He didn't
> unlatch all of them -- just the ones for the sheep who were old enough to
> go to pasture. If he was lucky, he might even sell a few of the
> nine-month-old lambs to the butchers of Midtown or Laselle for Equinox.
> Bola closed the barn gate and opened each unlatched pen behind him. One or
> two ewes filtered out, eager for the open space, but most stayed in their
> warm pens and looked back curiously at them.
>
> Volden and Bola together opened the barn door, and Volden whistled to the
> sheep. Those still sitting behind leapt to their feet and came running. In
> total, there were about seventy sheep ready to follow him, and about a
> dozen left in the barn. Volden expected eight to still be there by the time
> he returned in August.
>
> "Bola," Volden said once all the sheep were out. "Watch the sheep here
> while I'm gone. Your mother will help if you need anything. Take especially
> good care of the youngest lambs. Ginger's lambs."
>
> "I will. Ginger's a special ewe, isn't she?"
>
> Volden smiled. "She's what makes this flock so strong. And her lambs...
> they'll make this flock even stronger."
>
> In at least one small way, he and Bola could keep Lori alive.
>
>
>
> ----
>
>
>
> March 19, 717 CR
>
>
>
> Nancy spent most of her time in fear, shame, regret, and self-hatred. It
> was her words that had killed Lori. This was Eli's punishment for her
> stupid, selfish, pagan ritual, her twisting of Lori's doctrine for her own
> ends. Blood magic. Lori's words burned in her mind. Only the Moranasi
> committed death magic. She had committed the greatest of sins against her
> best friend. What reason did she have to live? How could there be any
> redemption, or forgiveness, for what she had done?
>
> Everyone was watching her all the time, never leaving her within range of a
> weapon, probably fearing she might take her own life, perhaps justifiably.
> Nancy knew she was too much of a coward to try it, to endure the pain. And
> yet? an animal morph like her, lives and dies for the pain. She had killed
> that badger in cold blood. Killing was what she wanted. She had tasted
> blood. Even if she did become a badger morph, wouldn't Metamor be better
> off with a deranged killer like her?
>
> Maybe she had just been deluded and ignorant. Yes, it was wrong of her to
> have trusted magic, to have tried to use it to countermand Eli's will.
> Perhaps all she needed to redeem herself was to swear off all magic. Maybe?
> maybe if she took up the old traditional cause, and led the Church's
> crusade against magic, she could redeem herself. She could save other
> people from making the same mistakes she did. All she had to do was flee to
> the Midlands?
>
> But no. If she became a badger morph, they would just kill her. And it
> would be just the same as if she had taken up the knife herself and cut her
> own guts out. She would just be inviting others to do the killing for her,
> to make killers out of them. Coward.
>
> Perhaps she should become a monk within Metamor's walls. She would shave
> her head, renounce all identity, and live only for the benefit of the
> faithful. Perhaps their faith could give her faith too, and strength to
> rise above her sins. Perhaps Lori's death didn't have to be in vain. It
> could be the start of a long career, of carrying the cross like Yahshua.
>
> This last thought was the only one that comforted her, for as long as it
> lasted, until the next thought came to her: "Is it faith that I want? Or is
> it just selfishness, believing that good can come from my horrible sin?"
> And she would be unconsolable again.
>
> At first, her parents refused anyone to see her, believing that she would
> recover in time, once the trauma of her manipulation by that wicked
> Benjamin had passed. Nancy never corrected the misconceptions of her
> parents, or of the rest of Twone, that it was her idea, that Benjamin would
> never have set it up if she wouldn't have asked Ophelia to help her.
>
> The days passed, and Nancy's mood still didn't lift. And her parents began
> fighting each other, as they often did when it came to their children. Her
> mother insisted that getting back to work would help her. Her father, her
> loathsome father, suggested that she see her friends again. Her mother
> insisted that her "friends" were the ones who had manipulated her into this
> situation to begin with. After the old familiar arguments about how
> ungrateful she was, and how much of an insensitive fool he was, she finally
> relented and allowed for chaperoned visitations from her friends.
>
> Tom was the first visitor, but there wasn't much he was willing to say
> under the watchful eyes and ears of her parents. All he could offer was
> feeble apologies for not being there, and talk a bit about how Benjamin was
> doing, and give some vague hope that Lori was alive. They never found her
> body, after all. Nancy barely listened. For all she knew, the pagan gods
> dragged Lori's whole body into one of their many hells.
>
> Maggie stopped by after that. She didn't bother talking about Lori's death;
> she tried instead to talk about local gossip, and she brought a game of
> checkers to improve her mood. Nancy couldn't focus at all on the game.
> Somehow she won, but she figured Maggie must have let her win.
>
> Marcus came by to talk about Ophelia, how she was feeling very sorry for
> the mess that had occurred. It was little comfort to Nancy, and only made
> her feel more guilty for hurting her. Bola came by, seeing he missed seeing
> her big sister around, and wanted to keep seeing Nancy around. That meeting
> was even worse. All these meetings did was confirm that her presence in
> Twone was a detriment to their happiness.
>
> It wasn't until plans for the Spring Equinox had gotten underway before her
> parents finally let her out of the cottage. They seemed indifferent now to
> whether she helped out around the house, or simply stayed lazy for the rest
> of her life. Nancy felt like she had betrayed them. Or maybe this was their
> way of saying that they wouldn't stop her if she tried to run away. It
> didn't seem like a bad idea.
>
> Still, she feared it was all an act, and if she ever did any conspicuous
> packing, that their mood would flip and they would forbid her again from
> leaving. Everytime she was outside, their eyes were always upon her,
> watching her as she went to bathe or fetch water, or even just pass the
> time watching young Bola lead the flock that had been left behind.
>
> Finally, the Friday before the Equinox began, Nancy could take it no more.
> It wasn't a deliberate decision, but after she dropped off the family
> scythe at the blacksmith's for repairs, she started walking north of town,
> just to clear her head. Then she found herself still walking, off towards
> the woods, down the familiar path through the tall grass. She found the
> familiar deer path, followed it past the mossy rockpile and to the stream,
> then past the thickets and past the lone oak, and finally arrived at the
> mud clearing.
>
> To any outsider, there was nothing remarkable about the mud clearing.
> Anything left behind had been long removed by rains and winds -- all except
> one thing. Nancy's eyes snapped to the one reminder of what had transpire
> that night, still sitting there from where she had left it that night --
> the rock.
>
> How long had it been sitting here, absorbing her memories and her pain,
> chaining her mind to the ritual, sapping whatever will she had to be free?
> Slowly, she stepped forward, fearing that some demon would strike her down
> as she approached, as if the lines of magic were still there, hidden
> beneath the mud. There was not even a gust of wind as she stood over it,
> and finally picked it up. If it was all in her head, why did she still feel
> a burning sensation in her hand as she held it? Through the stone, she
> could almost imagine the scene as Lori must have seen it. Such savagery.
> Such bloodlust.
>
> This was the first time she had been here since that night. Often she
> thought about the hours beforehand, as she stood watching Benjamin
> carefully draw out the symbols in the dimming light; or she thought about
> those minutes afterwards, and her strange wolf dream running through the
> woods. But she never thought about the ceremony. She'd been too afraid to
> look at it again, through her own eyes or through Lori's. Too afraid that
> she might find something she'd done wrong to make everything else collapse.
>
> She heard footsteps behind her ? she almost swore her ears swiveled in that
> direction. For some reason, that thought filled her with shame, rather than
> joy. Why should she be happy if it was really the animal curse? She
> wondered whether it was her parents come to drag her back, or maybe Errol
> sent on their behalf to fetch her. Maybe it was for the best if they caught
> her. Maybe they could whip this feeling out of her.
>
> But no, it was just Marcus. He pushed aside the ferns and stared at her in
> a mix of puzzlement and pity. "You came back."
>
> Nancy shrugged. "I thought I should visit." She didn't know how true that
> was, or if this was as far as she'd intended to travel.
>
> Marcus smiled weakly and nodded. "That's good." He looked at the field.
> "This might help you to heal."
>
> "There's nothing to heal."
>
> Marcus sighed. "You know the toughest part about being a man? It's everyone
> telling you not to feel pain anymore. Telling you not to grieve, when
> sometimes you have to."
>
> "Why should I grieve?"
>
> "... You didn't intend for this to happen."
>
> "I absolutely intended something to happen. I messed with the will of Eli."
>
> "No, I mean you didn't intend this specific outcome. You wanted to be an
> animal morph. That's all you wanted."
>
> "I was a fool," she said. "I wanted something without paying a sacrifice."
>
> "You didn't think you needed a sacrifice. You still don't, Nancy. The curse
> doesn't require a sacrifice."
>
> Nancy looked away. She didn't want to discuss this anymore.
>
> After a long silence, Marcus spoke. "Tom had a lot he wanted to talk with
> you about."
>
> "I don't care. I don't want to see him anymore. Is he still infatuated with
> me? Is he still convinced that we are going to be badger morphs together?"
>
> "There are some loose ends he needs to clear up with you, concerning that
> night. Please. You're not the only one who was hurt by what happened."
>
> Nancy rounded on him. "He left me and Lori to die. In the middle of the
> night, he could have stood by us, but he cared more about his reputation
> with the grown-ups than with us. Because of him, Lori is gone."
>
> "Do you want the whole story, or just your side of it?" Marcus sighed.
> "You're letting your anger and fear take over. Open your eyes. Keep them
> open."
>
> "Don't tell me to open my eyes," she hissed. "I've been keeping them open
> ever since that night. I can't sleep at night because of what happened. How
> do you sleep when every night you see and hear your own --"
>
> "Only yourself," Tom interrupted behind Nancy. He was standing in the
> middle of the mud pit, holding a familiar-shaped bag, with something
> stirring inside of it. "It hurts to listen sometimes. You just need to be
> patient."
>
> "What do you want?" Nancy hissed.
>
> Tom set down the bag, its neck already untied and open. "To start over."
>
> Nancy nearly lurched back as a badger nose sniffed its way out of the bag.
> "You... seriously expect me to repeat that ceremony? To chew out another
> beast's heart, to lose another friend to the same madness? Or are you that
> hungry for your own change, to go through it yourself? Well, fine then!
> I'll be the one to stare at you as you indulge yourself in blood! Then
> maybe the wolves of darkness can consume me too, for our heathen ceremony."
>
> "I didn't mean the ceremony," Tom said. And he gave the badger a light kick
> on its rear. Unlike the first badger, this badger seemed afraid to run
> away. It looked back and forth between the three of them with an almost
> domestic look in its eyes. It seemed to tense up under Tom's boot. Then it
> closed its eyes and...
>
> It seemed to almost melt closer to the ground, the way its body spread
> outwards, only without losing any height. In fact, it grew taller in
> height, the arms and legs spreading out like vines along the ground. The
> badger looked up at her with quivering blue eyes, its two human-like
> breasts naked but covered in white fur.
>
> "I'm so sorry, Nancy," it said in Lori's voice.
>
> Nancy fell to the ground.
>
>
>
> ----
>
>
>
> The two girls finally broke their long embrace. It was Lori who first found
> her words.
>
> "I ran without thinking. When I heard the people coming, I just kept
> running. I didn't stop until I had reached the mountains. It was still
> dark, so I just hid in a hole until morning." She paused. "I woke up and? I
> was still a badger. I thought it was still a dream, that it had to be a
> dream. I was afraid of having you see me like this. That maybe? I stole the
> curse that was intended for you?"
>
> Nancy shook her head. "I don't care if you did or not. You're alive! You
> have to come home."
>
> Lori shook her head. "I don't want to head back. I'm finally free of Twone.
> No one's been back to look for me. Everyone thinks I'm dead."
>
> "Your father was really hurt when he thought you were dead," Marcus said.
>
> Lori nodded sadly. "He would never have let me leave if I asked. He always
> had a way of making me feel guilty for wanting my own life."
>
> "You can't just live in the woods, though."
>
> "She's right," Tom said. "She's terrible at hunting. I've been leaving her
> dead rats and rabbits, just to keep her alive."
>
> "I've been thinking," Lori said, "that maybe I could move to Metamor. There
> are always new people coming in, and nobody asks questions of animal
> morphs. Or I could move into the northern villages. People are very
> accepting up there, and they won't know anyone from Twone up there."
>
> "But you'd be leaving us. You'd be leaving me, Lori. Our promise?"
>
> Lori smiled. "We really thought we could live our lives together, didn't
> we? You'll always have my friendship, wherever I end up."
>
> Nancy looked away at the mud that surrounded them. "So, that ceremony
> targeted you with the curse, instead of me."
>
> "I'm not so sure," Lori said. "Maybe I had the badger curse on me all
> along, and you picked up on it, somehow. You wanted to be with me, and
> somehow you knew that meant becoming a badger."
>
> "But you hated animal morphs."
>
> "I didn't hate them, they just made me uncomfortable." She looked down at
> her fur-covered arms. "Maybe I just needed to accept myself."
>
> Nancy nodded. "I still don't want you to leave."
>
> "You'll always have a part of me with you." Lori put her paw on the rock
> Nancy held. "Keep it. And remember me."
>
> Nancy pulled her into another long embrace. Marcus and Tom, and the quiet
> forest and all the heavens above, silently watched them.
>
>
> FIN
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> End of MKGuild Digest, Vol 179, Issue 14
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