[Mkguild] Isam-style summary of Llyn's Tribulations

[Rimme]

(Okay, I just couldn't resist. Here's another one, in even closer style 
to ISAM's summaries.)

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Olas: Commander, another stab victim in the street. Third one this week.

Randal: How awful. I remember when I was young, my family fled Nasoj's 
cruel reign, but ever since he cursed me into a man, I have never 
forgiven him.

Olas: I will summon a mage, at once. I remember when I was cursed, it 
was your twin sister who gave me comfort, and saved my sanity.

Rickkter: Curse this poorly lit room. I remember when I was cursed, I 
didn't interrupt the plot with irrelevant backstories.

Olas: What could have happened?

Rickkter: It was a powerful mage, stealing people's souls with a soul 
stealer. I'll keep an eye out for anyone with a magic sword.

Llyn: Muri, I've been cranky all week, unable to sleep well, and I must 
keep my sword with me at all times. Wanna make love?

Muri: Gee whiz!

Nahum: I am not gay, but I hate Llyn because she sleeps around a lot, 
except with me, and I am not gay.

Rescartes: As long as the mink holds my sword, Metamor Keep will be mine.

Nuia: Nom nom.

Kayla: Muri, Rickkter needs you to check out a crime scene with him. Put 
some clothes on, or next time I'll show up naked.

Llyn: Grrrr.

Kayla: Eeek!

Muri: Llyn!

Llyn: Boo-hoo.

Muri: Rickkter, I am concerned for Llyn's health.

Rickkter: I'm sure it's nothing. Our suspect is a female mustelid-type 
with a magic sword, possibly being mind-controlled.

Muri: Hmmm, I'll tell you if I see any.

Kyia: Greetings, I am the spirit of the Keep, and I have made a 
once-in-a-lifetime manifestation to you mortals, to say that I also have 
no idea.

Llyn: Muri, I am even more sleep-deprived, and ready to attack anyone I 
see with my sword. Let's make more love!

Muri: Hot diggity!

Rescartes: Hail Nasoj!

Rickkter: Muri, I think that mink of yours has a magic sword. She nearly 
beat me in a duel the other day.

Muri: I didn't see any magic in her sword. Maybe you just suck.

Llyn: Oh gods! I thought I was attacking Hough! I must go straight to 
Hough, so I can tell him not to be killed by me!

Hough: I will stand here, while you try to kill me.

Guards: We're here! Battle Guards on-demand!

Rescartes: Lutin zombies, attack! Whew, commanding is hard! Time for a 
half-hour break.

Giants: Roar!

Raven: I'm here to defend Hough!

Rickkter: I'm here to fight the sword!

Dream: I'm here to distract Llyn!

Muri: I'm here to save Llyn with the power of love!

Rescartes: Hmmm, 1 wizard, 1 really good fighter, and 1 who is both. 
Let's see how they fare against an army of 1 wizard!

Muri: Argh, my magic!

Llyn: No, not my Muri! (faints)

Muri: Good thing I can just use the Keep's magic supply instead.

Thomas: What's going on in there? As Duke, I have authority here!

Muri: Not now, dude. You, fox with the axe. Let's go.

Keep hallways: Swish swish.

Muri: Here is a gift of magic sight. This is the mind-control spell. 
Smash it with the Axe That Solves All Problems, and I will hook it up to 
the Keep's magic.

Rescartes: KABLOOIE!

Nuia: Nom nom.

Giant: Spare me!

Thomas: Sure. Put him in the Deus Ex Machina locker.

Rickkter: It's a simple case. She picked up the sword. If it 
mind-controls her, she's guilty. Case closed.

Misha: The question is not "Did she do it?" but rather "Does she feel 
remorse?"

Llyn: I'm a monster and an attempted murderer! Summon the headsman, a 
quick death is the least that I deserve!

Misha: I guess we'll never know.

Thomas: Well, the sword may be destroyed, but since it controlled you, I 
sentence you to a year of house arrest.

Murikeer: Yay, a happy ending!


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